There seems to have been a few question and some confusion over this one. I offer a few thoughts.
1. Having sex with someone and therefore becoming 'one flesh' does not mean that you have entered into marriage with them. What Paul is arguing for in 1 Corinthians 6 is the inappropriateness of engaging in sex which is meant for marriage, when you're not married. He's not arguing that it is marriage, or that you need to get married if you have had sex with someone....wow, I can sense some more questions coming back at me on that one...
2. Some of us feel the pain and grief of the mistakes of our past and need to be embraced by the full and transforming power of Christ's forgiveness. Does it mean that you can call yourself a virgin again? No it doesn't, but in God's eyes if you have received Christ as Lord you cannot be any cleaner or purer or distanced from those events in your past. Though some regret and shame may remain, it becomes all the more a testimony to God's grace and kindness to you.
3. If you have been the victim of some abuse and have been sexually violated by someone else there is great pain and hurt which only Christ can ultimately deal with. He heals the broken hearted and comforts the abused. The gospel shows you how powerful and significant is the acceptance and plans of Christ who not only removes our own personal sin, but also deals with sin done to us. The gospel will protect us from feeling worthless and ashamed and will help us not to feed our bitterness and hatred of the perpetrator, and even of God himself.
I know these are very hard areas for some of us. But I know that God is the master of dealing with our sin ravaged world and making all things new. Please trust his Word and perhaps aim to talk to someone you can trust so as to further experience the newness of life he has called you to.
I found the following response to the idea that "if you have sex with someone you have become one with them and therefore are married to them" really helpful.
ReplyDeleteThe bible states there are two times it is wrong to have sex. The first is if you are not married and the second is if you are married but the person you are having sex with is not your husband/wife. There are actually two different greek words for each of these things you should avoid. But, if having sex with someone makes you married to them, then the first of these two can never happen. You can't have sex when you are not married if in having sex you become married. If you did become married when you had sex with someone then most of the teaching about "sexual immorality" (this is the way most bibles translate the word that means having sex when you are not married), including the passages people use as evidence that sex equal marriage totally redundant! You can't interpret a verse in a way that makes the verse meaningless!
Hope this helps and happy to discuss.
Ken
Thanks Ken for this. I had to read it twice before I got it.
ReplyDeleteJust thought I'd mention... I found Marcus' talk that went with this post sensitive, yet humerous. Also, it was the first time I heard Michelle give a talk; it was a good first impression.
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