When Paul addresses husbands and wives in Ephesians 5 our cultural senstitivites begin to rise. I can't think of many more controversial parts of the Bible and as it's read you can almost feel the collective cringe. Although this is a hard part of Scripture for us to come to terms with, it seems to me that we must give such a passage a fair and humble reading. Is it possible that we potentially de-canonize and 'right off' parts of the Bible by putting them in the too hard basket? Is Ephesians lurking in the bottom of the basket somewhere?
What a shame this would be because what is said on marriage here is the most important not only in the Bible, but (of course) anywhere else as well. No passage honours marriage so highly, nor effectively protects marriage from destructive and ungodly habits. This is so because Paul grounds and frames mariage in the truth of the Gospel itself. Indeed he is actually using marriage to talk again about the wonder of Christ and our relationship and blessing in him.
Lots of great questions came out from Sunday's talk and a loving church will engage with these honestly and lovingly. Perople were keen to explore issues like:
How can a single person really be an encouragement to someone who is married?
How does Ephesians 5 work out when the marriage relationship has been so poorly modeled to you?
Are you meant to 'practice' sacrificial leadership and humble submission before you get married?
How can someone submit to another if they really, really disagree with the other person?
I'm keen that we explore these issues together...hopefully without the cultural cringe. Indeed feel free to explore them in this forum.
Also, for those of us who are married, those of us planning to get married some day, or those of us who know anyone who might be married... "Married for God" pictured above, is a very helpful book. The author really nails it on some key issues on what marriage is really for and how it is grounded in the reality of Christian faith. So you'll learn as much about God as you will abou marriage from this book....and it's very challenging, whether you're married or not.
Finally, I was really pleased that people were seeking to think through how we care for each other as a congregation. Whether single or married we are all Christ's body and Ephesians 4 & 5 gives us a great model for how to be caring for one another. Christ focussed and other person centered. Let's keep praying for each other and considering how we can best glorify God in our midst.
Married for God by Christopher Ash: Available at the bookstall after church.
One of the issues raised during the talk was the tendency to think of finally 'arriving' when you get married and the idea that marriage will solve all of lifes problems.
ReplyDeleteI have a humerous mathematical proof of why this is not so.
Axiom: we're all idiots, the Bible clearly indicates this.
In a normal friendship this equals idot + idiot (or 2*idiot). In a marriage situation this is equal to idiot².
Given that idiot is so large, idiot² >> 2*idiot.
To use the old Captain Planet saying "by our powers combined we have MORE idiot!"
So, while marriage is a good thing, it's still much harder than being single. We married folk would do well to remind those who are single of this, so they can enjoy it while they can.
I think the cultural cringe kind of ruins the topic for everyone. It means that, whenever the passage is preached on, the preacher has to spend most of the sermon 'apologising' for it, and trying to make people see beyond the knee-jerk reaction; very little is left to actually get anything real from the passage.
ReplyDeleteMaybe it should be done in two lots, the first to get the cringe out of the way, the second to actually explore the passage?
Sam, as the Python boys say, "It's sweet to be an idiot."
i'm with someone, so i'm not being a bitter and twisted single person, but i think we should celebrate single people just like we clap those who announce their engagement. here's such and such and she/he is single - yay, clap clap clap
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